What is my problem with authority? There are times when I am perfectly happy with someone who is telling me what is what or what to do or where to go; then there are other times when I can't stand a person telling me anything, let alone something that will have some sort of bearing to the future. What is the difference between these two types of people in my head? I think it comes from my own perceptions of them. If I think that they are capable people who know more than I, or course I will listen to them. But if I think that they are on the same level as me, or heaven forbid below me, I feel like they are hypocritical telling me what to do or giving me advice. That's why presentation is so important for a person like me. It's not even really about the way they dress, maybe sometimes, but I'm doubtful. I think it has more to do with the way they speak. I am thinking of one person in particular here. I don't know, maybe I am just a snob.

Hmmm, let's try not to piss anyone off today.

I now officially give permission for people and companies to start celebrating Christmas. You cannot start before Thanksgiving like so many did, or, even worse, before Halloween like a couple did. Don't these people know what is going on? It's called the Holiday Season; it's not the Christmas Season, each holiday has it's own worth. It seems like people just tolerate these other holidays so that they can get to the real one, when they can consume to their heart's delight, indeed, when they might be called a Scrooge for not spending all their money on frivolous items. What kind of holiday is this? An American one, that's what kind.

Proud to be American

Thanksgiving on the other hand is just kind of odd. We give thanks by spending all day cooking and then stuffing ourselves with what we made. Unless you're a man, then you spend all day watching television while the women cook, and then you stuff yourselves.

hunger

...

No more consuming for me! Except for the table and the barstool that I don't need. They were cheap. Does it count if they were cheap?? At least I didn't buy any of the $100 and up-ers that were cute and just begging to be bought. But then, if I bought everything in that store that I liked, I would 1) be broke and in debt, and 2) have nowhere to put any of it!! Maybe it doesn't matter if they are cheap, managed to not buy the 2.99 item, but that one was really mess-ed up!

Tomorrow is the big day, the day that has all turkeys shaking in their boots. That's right...Thursday. Today is the day that I'm leaving on a car-plane, but I know when I'll be back again. Saying goodbye isn't all that hard. Noone to kiss, that's for sure... I think I must be screwing up the order, but that's okay. Just don't shoot me!! Pay attention to whether the gun has bullets in it or not! That's a good girl.

Does singing mean happiness?? I sing all the time, but I don't necessarily think that I am happy. And remember, the slaves in the South used to sing out of misery according to Frederick Douglass. So therefore, why do we associate singing with happiness. People automatically think I'm happy if I'm singing. The only problem is that I don't differentiate the songs I sing when I'm happy and when I'm sad. But then, I don't think about whether I am happy or sad, I just sing because I feel like it or I have an evil song in my head that won't leave.

I guess I have to do some Japanese homework now. This must be homework weekend. Doing homework after 10 is just not working for me anymore.

Alice's Restaurant

I HAVE to end the agony! There is more to life than what is currently going on. Reading books may not seem like the world's greatest passtime, but when you can't, it seems like it! What to do, what to do??? Only 3 or 4 more weeks of the current agony, and then we can see if the next agony is any less painful, which I think it might be. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I need my time to myself that is not doing homework, or should be doing homework. The mornings are nice, but I should be, or think I should be, working during them, so that ruins it!

Shoes, and clothes, and furniture that I won't have anywhere to put next year, and stupid little things that I don't need (like hampers shaped after animals), and CDs, and appliances, and stuffed animals...lots of money. If only it weren't for money, I would be a happy, consuming, camper!

Negatives are cool. I don't not want nothing! Do you hear me!!! Even I, who made up the sentence, can't fully understand what I mean unless I count the negatives and move on from there. They really are the randomist thing ever to walk the Earth.

I am sick of music! I don't want to do it anymore! But if I don't sign up for the class, what am I going to do with my cello. Ahh, why do I own my own instrument. And it's not like I can get rid of it. Not that I don't want to play, on the contrary, I just don't want to play with certain people.

Three day weeks are silly. What can you get done in a three day week?? Not much, that's what you can get done! But hopefully it will allow me the opportunity to get some other stuff done. How the heck do you turn in a rough draft for a movie? Are we even doing a movie?? I hope we can use the equipment! What else do they use it for. We had better get cracking! I wonder when Madagascar is due. That would probably be a good thing to know.

Am I am worthwhile person? Is there any value to me? Or am I just another mouth to feed on this overpopulated planet? I like to think not, but there is that doubt sitting somewhere. I am just a consumer consuming things and making life harder for 5 billion other people. I guess. What's the point?