Watch out! The spiders have formed a large conspiracy. Are they out to get you too?

Fact 1: Spiders are malicious, devious creatures who enjoy making people miserable.

Fact 2: They somehow brainwashed me into not squishing them when I find them. Instead they take control of my body and make me take them outside where they can plot their next attack.

Fact 3: They usually come at me when I am relaxed and unsuspecting at home.

Fact 4: They have started attacking me at work!

Fact 5: They made me switch regular parking spots at work by marking their territory (read: they built a freaking web on my car!).

Fact 6: They often stretch their webs across the walkway I use to go into the office.

Fact 7: THEY KNOW WHERE I SIT AT WORK and they sit under my desk and wait for me. And then they escape the upside-down pen holder I use to catch them and make me scream and attract the attention of the whole office.

You can't deny the facts. We must unite against the eight-legged-boogeyman!

"I adore you, but you don't know who you are."

Today I saw a horse doing an excellent impression of a stuff Black Beauty statue. His tail wasn't even waving in the wind. Had there been anyone else on that particular road, he would have witnessed an accident. Then he shook his head and went on his way. Who know horses stare off into space like everyone else.